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No no no no nooooo… Gör om gör rätt.
November 11, 2009, 11:47 am
Filed under: En serieskapares vardag, English, Family, Mentor, Om boken, Om mig, When I was younger
Filed under: En serieskapares vardag, English, Family, Mentor, Om boken, Om mig, When I was younger
Just had a very giving meeting with Stina. She confirmed my doubts about the ending. It is not the right ending for this book. There is something missing. I know it.
But how to end what is not yet over, I ask thee Lord, how?!
To be continued?
A promise of a second book?
Ah, I’ll read it again and again, the ending will present itself. Soon. I can feel it. Come on Frida, you can do this! Just listen to the story and let it tell itself to you. Maybe it is mom and dad and my escape from their fucked-up divorse that is the true core of this book. Maybe. Yeah. Or not. We’ll see. Now, I will listen. And wait. Great things will come… great things.
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Frida the fan-girl
Otherwise I still have this blog to live for, right?
Like when I was in Athens and thought I was gonna die… haha, that’s a good one.
November 11, 2009, 1:23 am
Filed under: En serieskapares vardag, English, Inspiration, Love, Om boken, Om mig, When I was younger
Filed under: En serieskapares vardag, English, Inspiration, Love, Om boken, Om mig, When I was younger
I am working from home today (read: slept till 15.00 in the afternoon, went out for an hour to see Liv Strömquist at Amalthea bokcafé, came home, ate soup, watched the amazing race… and now putting curlers in my hair! This is so much fun! Haven’t done something like this since I was like… in middle school or something!)
I’ve also come to turns with the fact that I will allways and for ever be in love with Lina Neidestam.
Yes yes, I know, we both are man-loving heteros, but still… she does make my heart jump sometimes…with her funny and beautiful artwork and her warm, charming personality and that cute as a button yet serious and determined face…
Lina, if I ever make a successful sex-change-operation, or if my mind enters the body of a steaming hot man, will you then be my wife?
I’ll cook for you! Read you bedtime-stories! Make you laugh at least once a day! I’ll be your biggest fan (allready am) and your slave and business manager, and make you world-famous and hey! why not go for conqueror of the universe while we’re at it?! You and me, Lina! You and me, to the stars!
Okay, we’ll see if she goes for it.
Otherwise I still have this blog to live for, right? 
……………………………………………………………………
Yeah, so the book then! How’s that going? Well, it’s coming along fine.
I am re-reading the ending, changing it, reading it again, changing it. Writing an epilogue. Trying to explain why I don’t explain everything. Why I leave some threads open, unconcluded. Like my parents divorce, I never really pick up that storyline again.
But I had to limit myself somewhere… I am up at 120 pages now, and haven’t even told half of my story yet.
I chose to end it at the finally of Model search. Because that’s the end of something at least.
But there just has to be a second book. There are simply too many good stories from that time of my life that have gone untold.
Like when I was in Athens and thought I was gonna die… haha, that’s a good one. 
And yes! Ah! That hotel/hostel I was living in with all the other models! I have to tell you ’bout that!
Maybe you’ve seen on that tv-show Top Model how they live in a nice apartment with beautifully coloured furniture and luxurious bathrooms..? Well, on our model-hotel in Athens the standard was a bit lower than that…
Example: the shower was just a hose. Like a garden-hose, you know?!
Haha, I really hated it,
the floor in there was all gravelly too! And we had to be clean-shaved everyday so there was no getting around using it either.
All that damned shaving. Jesus, it annoyed me so.
It has now been like 6 years since I last shaved my legs. Some kind of protest… Or maybe just plain lazyness. I don’t know anymore.
I’m actually even considering shaving them now. I imagine it would be an interesting experience. Maybe I’d be thrown back in time by the smooth sensation of hairless legs and come to re-live those younger years of being Frida.
hm. yeah. could be interesting.
I’m listening to Immortal Technique again. The song I linked you to there is a beautiful story of love lost.
Last night I had a Peter Lemarc-marathon. His lyrics are often true and honest.
Lyrics. I think that’s the common denominator of the music I fall in love with.
Exception being the classical music I adore of course. But that’s like a totaly different category. A language of it’s own. It sounds more like painted art than it does other music genres.
My darlings, I’ve found that there is in this life beauty to be found in so many things.
Ahhh, yes, this life…
Ya just gotta love it,
ya know?
Arbeit Macht Frei(da)
November 8, 2009, 3:47 am
Filed under: En serieskapares vardag, English, Om boken, When I was younger
Filed under: En serieskapares vardag, English, Om boken, When I was younger
It is night. I am at Comic Art School all alone and actually getting things done.
Just had a terrible candy-craving and searched the entire school for any sort of goodies…
All I found were apples. Two green apples on one desk and two red on another one.
Kids are way too healthy nowadays.
Made myself a cup of tea and ate some of my own peanuts instead. Oh well… I’ll buy some cookies ‘n stuff tomorrow, just incase this kind of emergency ever strikes again.
Right now I’m writing the part of my story where I get to go on Guido Dolces boat, and then go scuba diving. There were many experiences from my modeling days that I’m endlessly gratefull for. The scuba diving is probably the most wonderfull memory I have of that time. Maybe of my entire life, come to think of it… It was just sooo magical.
Under the surface everything was beautiful, I could see it all so clearly and with new eyes somehow.
I never wanted to resurface again. I wanted to stay down there for ever and ever and ever.
But all things come to an end and even though I signalled the diving instructor to take me further down, deeper into the deep, he decidedly took me right back up to the boat again after only like 10 (?) minutes below.
Anyway, it feels good to be at it with the book again. Sketching and writing, page after page… There are so many pages now! will I reach the end of it all soon? Can I even make an ending for it? Or will it just keep on keeping on until the end of all time?
Je sais pas. I can see myself with the finished book in my hand at least. And that’s a good thing. If you ask Napoleon Hill, he’d say it’s even essential for the reaching of any goal in life.
I should get on home now. Get some shut-eye. But I’m not really tired yet. It’s only the last scraps of sanity telling me that when it’s 04.23 it’s way past my bedtime.
Yeah yeah… I’ll git goin…
G’night mes amis. Here’s a nice country song to rock you gently to sleep tonight. Don’t thank me for it, thank Johan K. If it hadn’t've been for him I wouldn’t've heard it.
This is Frida. Det är tänkt som en bänk i Nytan, för er som känner Stockholm.
Okay, there’s one place where the “m” looks like an “n”… Blah! Crap.
…Should I re-do it? Is it readable?
hm. I was kind of in a hurry to get it over and done with (for no other reason but my hectic self. It’s not like I had a deadline or anything. Silly Friducha… Allways in a rush…)
I am considering to make something of the background above her head where it’s white now. Maybe just fill it up with black. Or, just leave it like this and work on my book for a change… ehhhe hehe…
But now it’s time for glögg with Johan and Lullis so no more work aujourd’hui, à demain mes amis!
The good the bad and the Frida
I wrote this short comic in english first
and then translated it to swedish.
Strange way of going about it…
and the result was… well… a text in swedish that doesn’t really have the rythm to it that I’m after.
hm… I’m thinking of rewriting it again… We’ll see…
The drawing-part is completed now at least and below you can see the title page “Frida for good and bad” (I’m thinking of “Being Frida, for good and bad” instead…has a better ring to it I think.)
Love me or leave me
I woke up at 15.00 today. And why? Cause I stayed up ’til like 5 in the morning reading Mikael Sols blog. Je suis un peut patetique. (was that pretend-french or was it correct? Je ne sais pas…).
Fabian is a great mentor. I think of him sometimes. His proffessionalism and warmth. Very easy to listen to. And easy to talk to. A perfect mentor.
The whole idea behind the mentor-system at Comic Art School is like a child of the mastermind-principle… Oh! Mastermind-principle, that sounds interesting! So, what is it all about, you might ask yourself! (this is the part when I become a crazy secterian preacher) Well, let me illuminate you my dear child!
So, there is something called the mastermind-principle explained here by mr Napoleon Hill. I’ve been listening to him the last couple of months and he has made me aware of so many things that I was allready doing to make myself better. But now I do them contiously and with a purpose!
He has many very good things to say about creating success and happiness in your life. With the most important part of the principle being to keep a positive mental attitude towards all subjects and persons with whom you interact.
“You need positivity like you need respect in jail, cause without it you’ll be making negative record sales” to quote Immortal Technique (he is the Thruth, brought to you in the form of hip-hop). ^_^
That’s enough for today. I’ll preach more another day.
Just know that if you wish for success, Napoleon Hill has many helpfull hints on how to reach your goals. And also on how to live a more harmonious life. BUT you need to have a somewhat open mind to make use of his teachings. For he speaks of faith… and I know there are people out there who are uncomfortable with the whole faith-concept… so, I guess Im saying that everything is not for everybody.
Peace be with you my friends
I wish success harmony and love on all of you!
Let us reach the highest mountain together,
In šaʾ Allāh
…and when you get hit in the face with sudden failure (it can happen to the best of us), remember that the Lord works in mysterious ways… and it’s not failure until you accept it as failure. Winners never quit!
Allting har en mening,
men korven den har två.
Pannkakan har ingen,
men den är god ändå!
Det här är en sammanställning av lite olika frågor som mina fans brukar ställa till mig (obs: lögn. Jag snodde dem från Mickes blogg)
Min storasyster. Vi är även gifta nu. Incest är bäst familjefest!
1. Vad är sann lycka?
Semlor (med mycket grädde) och julafton - i kombination! Har ännu inte lyckats sammanföra dessa två fenomen, men när det händer då kommer änglakörer att sjunga i mitt bröst och jag kommer dansa i ett virvarr av lyckorus som kommer klinga i regnbågens alla färger. Med extra glitter!
2. Vilken är din största rädsla?
Att allt bara var hittepå. Att inget var på riktigt.
…eller att ingen ska tycka om mig.
4. Vilken egenskap föraktar du mest hos dig själv?
Förakt är ett hårt ord. Jag gillar det inte alls. Självförakt är helt fel väg att gå… Jag kan säga att jag kan ogilla mitt extrema bekräftelsebehov. Det skulle vara skönare att inte vara så törstande efter uppskattning hela tiden.
4. Vilken egenskap föraktar du mest hos andra?
Att de kan formulera frågor som “Vilken egenskap föraktar du mest hos andra”. Det är så dumt. Då sätter man ju bara igång en ondskefull spiral av negativt tänkande! Fråga om kärlek och styrka istället.
5. Vilken levande person beundrar du mest?
Mamma och Julie Doucet (jag tycks ha placerat in dem i samma fack i hjärnan).
6. Hur känner du dig just nu?
Glad. Ensam. Sugen.
7. När ljuger du?
Jag kallar det inte för att ljuga. Jag kallar det för att gissa med självsäker röst.
8. Vad ogillar du mest med ditt utseende?
Nu förstår jag inte frågan.
9. Vilka kvaliteter uppskattar du mest hos män?
Att de smakar gott och tycker att jag är rolig.
10. Vilka kvaliteter uppskattar du mest hos andra kvinnor?
Att de luktar gott och tycker att jag är rolig.
11. Vilka ord eller uttryck använder du för ofta?
“Magiskt” (med maniska ögon) “Kärlek!” (med handen pressad mot bröstet och solsken i blick)
12. Vem eller vad är ditt livs kärlek?
Min storasyster. Vi är även gifta nu. Incest är bäst familjefest! 
13. Vilken talang skulle du vilja ha?
Jag har ju redan allt… eller nej, flyga! Flyga vill jag kunna! men det är ju ingen talang.
14. Om du kunde förändra en sak med dig själv, vad skulle det vara?
Att jag… jaa… nä. jag är nog ganska nöjd egentligen. Det jag velat förändra har jag ju förändrat. Och när jag kommer på något att förändra hos mig själv så gör jag ju bara det. Jag har tänkt på att skaffa fler tattueringar.
15. Vilken är din största bedrift?
Att jag vågade möta ensamheten och tog ett eget beslut och gjorde slut.
16. Om du skulle dö och fick återvända som en person eller sak, vad skulle du välja?
Gandalf.
17. Vilken av dina ägodelar håller du högst?
Den här frågan satt jag väldigt länge och funderade över. Har dragit igenom hela inventarielistan i huvudet… De två saker som jag skulle fått oro i själen av att inte ha var Philips Wake-Up-Light och Grönsaksbuljongen. Men egentligen kan jag nog släppa allt.
Bara jag får ha mitt ansikte kvar
dold i min älsklings hår.
18. Vad är det värsta en människa kan uppleva?
Att se sina barn dödas framför ögonen på dem. (word Mikael)
19. Vilken är din favoritsysselsättning?
Att smeka mig. hähähä
20. Vilket är ditt mest utmärkande drag?
Att jag på ett nästintill störande sätt vill bli sedd och hörd hela tiden. Även att jag bjuder på kakor och godis för att få kompisar.
21. Vilka är dina favoritförfattare?
Gud som skrev Bibeln. Det finns bara en och jag håller Hans hand. (vad hette han som sjöng den, Johan? Jag ville länka till den låten…)
22. Vilken påhittad person gillar du mest?
Frida Ulvegren
23. Vilken historisk person identifierar du dig mest med?
Andy Bernard
24. Vilka är de största hjältarna i ditt liv?
De som väljer att vara goda. Som inte dömmer andra. Som gläds åt sina systrar och bröders lycka. Som dom vill jag vara.
25. Vad ogillar du mest?
Ostsmulor på köksbordet eller fet spindel i sängen. (båda har dykt upp i kollektivet där jag bor nu. båda händelserna skakade mig och gav ångest.)
26. Vad ångrar du djupast?
Att jag var så elak mot Ullis en gång så att hon började gråta. Det var mer än 10 år sedan nu.
Av allt dumt jag gjort är det fortfarande det som jag ångrar mest.
förlåt.
27. Hur skulle du vilja dö?
nöjd.
28. Vilket är ditt motto?
Tro på dig sjelv så ska du se att det går.
Party!
I’ll be MC:ing at a Halloween party at Debaser Malmö tonight!
The theme for costumes are Comics,
so I have transformed myself into Delirium.
I’ll add a pic tomorrow…
A good day
Then I took a loooong walk (ok, I admit… it was only like 45 minutes of walking, but still! It’s a lot for me!) to Tekniska museet where I met up with Mia to talk about my new job (fröken Frida! I’m o be a teacha! Yay!!!) which I will be kicking off on wednesday the week after this. For reals! They’re mine now! My children!
October 29, 2009, 12:46 am
Filed under: Uncategorized
Filed under: Uncategorized
I wish everyday could be like this… Today felt a little bit like christmas. (did you notice how his hair in that video was a s-t-r-o-k-e o-f g-e-n-i-o-u-s?!)
First I had a good and quite productive morning at CAS.
I was on time AND had showered before leaving for school!
I made a copy of my zine for Niklas, one of my mentors, while watching a youtube-clip of google-wave. (I want google-wave… it’s like msn and facebook, only better! g-g-goooogle!!! I love them!!! GogoGOGOGogoogoOGOOogoGOOoGLe!!!)
Then I took a loooong walk (ok, I admit… it was only like 45 minutes of walking, but still! It’s a lot for me!) to Tekniska museet where I met up with Mia to talk about my new job (fröken Frida! I’m o be a teacha! Yay!!!) which I will be kicking off on wednesday the week after this. For reals! They’re mine now! My children! I’m like Jesus: just let the children come to me! LET THEM COME!
I then took a nice stroll down to the comic book store at Lilla Torg. They still didn’t have Julie Doucet’s My new york diary… what’s up with that?! A comic book store that doesn’t have Julie?! WHAT?!
Then I went to Science fiction-bokhandeln, and almost had a nervous breakdown (not true, I was calm as a bucket of sour milk, but for the sake of the story I chose to exaggerate my reaction here) because of that lousy excuse for a comic book shelf they have.
In some respects Stockholm definitely still has the upper hand on Mmö… I mean; Alvglans, Comics heaven, Staffar, SoFo comics, Science fiction-bokhandeln in Old Town… and there are even a few more that I can’t remember the names of right now.
Yeah yeah, ‘nough o’ this jibberjabber! On to the good parts! Yes. So, I had lunch at Govindas, bestest lunch ever! I read Lokas Till mina vänner och ovänner as I ate. (Fascinating and funny, she is! The one where she’s afraid to use the phone, haha, beautifully humourous!).
Then back to school where I sketched 6 pages (Hurra!) for the book.
At 6 o’clock Lisa, me and Loulou went to Niklas art exhibit. He is so frikkin’ talented! He is pure inspiration to me!
I drooled over his paintings for a while, gave him my zine, said hello to Knut, that elegant man, and then headed off to the next event of the evening…
Which was the lovely Loka Kanarp! She spoke about her book Pärlor och Patroner at Amalthea bokcafé.
I so enjoyed listening to her! Liv Strömquist acted as interviewer for the talk, and she’s awesome to listen to too! ^_^ Ah!
Such a great day!
Had a late dinner with Loulou, Johan, Lisa and Tomas.
I especially enjoyed the company of Loulita today. She is clever and sweet and funny. Lots of love 2 you LouLou!
Oh goddesses and gods, the allmighty spirits of forsight and love, I give thanks for this wonderful day.
Filled with so many blessings.
Mash’allah! Allah akhbar!
It feels just like christmas in my heart today!
I even spoke to Ullis on the phone. This day was indeed perfect! <3
New titel page for the book!
October 26, 2009, 11:37 pm
Filed under: Drawings, English, Frida favorites, Om boken, Utdrag ur serien
Filed under: Drawings, English, Frida favorites, Om boken, Utdrag ur serien
Today I’ve been thinking and sketching and drawing on a new cover for my book.
The one I had before was more of a general Fridas diary-cover and since this first book (yes, first of three… I’m thinking of making it a trilogy: The Chronicles of Frida! ahm…what was that? My head? It grew bigger you say? That’s strange…) will be concentrating on my first years as a model, I wanted something special for that.
I wanted Nina/me to look model-sexy, but still scared and uncomfortable like I was when I was 14.
Gunnar said it would be good to have the word model in the title, so I’m trying out Modelljakten (Model search).
I would like the title to look like a neon Motel sign, so it should be a bit more bulging than this and maybe with a bit of a glow.
Can’t really say why I want it like that, just that I like Motel signs I guess…
And the colour is smooth wine red (maybe brownish), ’cause thats the way it has to be.
It’s just the colour of this story.
It’s also close to the colour I’ve been using for most of my blog entrys about this book.
I don’t think it could be any other way really…
